Silence (and distance) makes the heart grow fonder makes the heart grow fonder
They knew each other from their elementary school days. Her father and his aunt introduced them to each other. Studying in the same high school, it was there when they had the chance to form a bond that became deeper than friendship.
In October, 1998, two years after their courtship began, Ruth said yes to Marvin. She graduated from high school and proceeded to study in DLS-CSB’s Bachelor in Applied Deaf Studies under the SDEAS. Marvin followed her to DLS-CSB and applied to the same program a year after. She smiles and animatedly recounts in sign language that she fell for him because he was respectful and understanding. He readily agrees. Yes, Marvin and Ruth are both deaf. Marvin’s deafness was caused by natural illness. Both his parents are deaf although Marvin was born hearing. At three months, Marvin contacted a high fever that caused him to lose his hearing. Ruth was born profoundly deaf, attributed to the various prescribed medicines that her mother took while pregnant with her.
GOING THE DISTANCE
Struggling with a long distance relationship was one of the main challenges that both had to face. In 2002, Ruth had to leave for the US. She had hoped that she would be able to come back right away but the processing of her travel papers took time. They had to content themselves communicating via online chat and webcam. In 2003, Ruth came back to the Philippines to fi nish her studies. After both clinched their Bachelor’s Degrees (Applied Deaf Studies), they got engaged. After nine years and a half of being together, they got married on November 11, 2006.
ENTERING THE WORKING WORLD
Finding a job in a foreign country proved to be difficult but Ruth forged ahead, “My background is in graphic arts but my first job was in a bakery. It was very different from the career I wanted but I needed the money to survive.” “Then a family friend encouraged me to apply in a dental laboratory.” Ruth continued, “They told me that in dental aesthetics, I just need to use my eyes and my hands. So I applied and after the interview, they accepted me right away. My mom acted as my interpreter.” Ruth’s colleagues are all hearing and the one seated next to her is assigned to monitor her work. She has been in this dental lab for two years now. Meanwhile, Marvin was hired as technical support staff and was eventually promoted to administrator of the two main computer laboratories (the PEN-International Multimedia Learning Center and the PEN-International Learning Center) in DLS-CSB. Both were built through a generous grant by the Nippon Foundation through PEN International, a global partnership of colleges and universities serving the higher education needs of deaf students.
READY TO HAVE A FAMILY
Now that they are finally together after more than three years of being apart, Marvin and Ruth can discuss more about family matters. “We tried to learn from the experiences of other deaf married couples. Now we know what to do, how to prepare,” Ruth explains. “Now we can start discussing scheduling issues, finances, finding more time to communicate. We’re ready to have a family.” Both credit their success to their DLS-CSB education with the full support of SDEAS. “We would like to thank SDEAS for giving us opportunities to grow. We had a lot of good experiences and guidance in new technology,” shares Marvin. “Before, I didn’t know anything about deaf awareness and culture and I’m glad I was given the chance to learn.” Ruth adds, “I really admire DLS-CSB for helping in bringing out the confidence in us.” Currently, the couple is already settling in at their home in cold Virginia as they eagerly look forward to spring and the promise of a new, exciting life.
